Salt Lake Bees

139

NOTE: This review incorporates text from the review for the previous Bees logo, which was posted 2011 July July 4.

For anyone who is wondering, the name "Salt Lake Bees" comes from the fact that the beehive is a a symbol of either Utah or the Mormons. Oh, who are we kidding; to be a symbol of Mormons is to be a symbol of Utah and vice versa. In fact, I would go so far as to say that Utah is a symbol of the Mormons, and vice versa. This, combined with my previous sentence, means that Utah is a symbol of Utah, and Mormons are a symbol of Mormons. I'm not sure that makes any sense, but you know what I'm saying.

Because of its status as a symbol of Umortahmonism, the beehive appears on Utah's state highway route markers, its state seal, and its state flag. And you might expect the baseball team to use a beehive as well, for similar reasons. But no. They go with an actual bee. No, wait, they don't. They go with what so many teams go with, which is a weird mutant that's half-human, half-whatever-the-team-is-named, and said mutant is playing baseball because of course it is. On the bee side of the equation, the mutant has antennae and wings. Although they're not really on the bee side of the equation, because they don't look like bee antennae or bee wings. It's not even the right number of wings; bees have four wings and this creature has only two. But then again, this is a mutant, so the rules don't really apply. Maybe they just took the four wings that bees have and the zero that humans have and averaged it out. Who the hell knows?

On the more human side of the equation, the mutant has two eyes like a human (bees have five, believe it or not), and those eyes clearly look like human eyes. It also has human arms and human legs. However — and this is the truly weird part — our mutant werebee somehow manages to have short sleeves and pantlegs despite clearly wearing neither a shirt nor pants. Truly, this creature is a marvel of nature, and not in a good way.

As for the rest of the logo, it's nothing great but nothing bad. The werebee is in the middle of a circle that has the team name on it, as well as the word "Baseball". I'm glad they put that there, because without that the werebee's stance might make me think he's playing rugby football. Or maybe, now that I think about it, softball. See, the werebee clearly has a stinger, and male bees don't. So the werebee must be female.

Or maybe it can be male. I mean, once a bee has human eyes, human arms and legs, only two wings, antennae that look nothing like bee antennae, and pantlegs as part of its body, is anything off limits anymore? Like I said, this creature is a marvel of nature.

Final Score: 139 points.
Penalties: Obvious, 17 pts; Humanoid, 30 pts; Cartoon, 47 pts; Player, 51 pts.
Bonuses: Local, -6 pts.